Adoption Blog - Adoptimist
April 19, 2017

Siblings Separated By Adoption

One of the great things about open adoption is you can tailor-make an adoption plan to fit each birth and adoptive family’s situation. This is especially helpful when a birthmother has children she is currently parenting at the time of placement or has plans for future children and wants those children and her placed child(ren) to know one another. One of the big reasons why I personally chose open adoption for my unborn baby, was that open adoption would allow... Read more…

March 14, 2017

Interview With Bailey Correll: Legal Representation For Birthparents

Bailey Correll is a clinical medical psychology graduate student at Mercer University in Georgia. Bailey is also a birthmom of 5 years. Bailey is working on an interesting research project from a birth parent’s point of view that looks at the interactions between birth parents and legal professionals before the adoption is finalized. As you may recall, I wrote an article about how I did not meet the attorney who was representing my rights as a birthmother until right before I was about to Read more…

March 1, 2017

Birthmother Retreats: What Are They?

Donate to the 2017 Birth Mother Retreat! Thirteen years ago, in the spring of 2005, I was having a late-night phone conversation with my best friend and fellow birthmother, Leilani. She and I had met about a year and half prior as the result of an “is anyone out there” post she had placed on an adoption forum looking for another birthmother who understood what she was going through. I stumbled across that post and emailed her as I was desperately seeking another birthmother to talk to. We had... Read more…

February 22, 2017

Parenting Vs. Adoption: The Toughest Decision You Will Ever Make

Recently I was talking with an expectant mother considering adoption. She was nearly 7 months pregnant and had been going back and forth between parenting and making an adoption plan. She was reaching out to both single mothers and birthmothers trying to find out what it’s really like. “Be totally real with me and tell me everything I need to know as I try to make this decision,” she said. “How did you figure out what was the right decision?” It seems like an easy enough question to answer, right? But unfortunately, there is no road map on how to... Read more…

February 9, 2017

An Open Letter To Hopeful Adoptive Parents

Dear Hopeful Adoptive Parent, Perhaps you have no children yet running the halls of your home and have turned to adoption to start your family. Or maybe you have adopted a couple of times already or have a few biological kids and are hoping to add a sibling to the mix by adopting. Whatever your back story is, you are likely reading this because you are hoping to adopt and in the process of adopting now. I won’t pretend to know the emotions you are feeling or exactly what the experience and process has been like up to this point for you. I’ve never... Read more…

January 24, 2017

Repairing A Damaged Relationship With Your Child’s Birthmother

Adoption can be a beautiful thing, but it can also be messy at times. There is a lot of heartache and loss that surrounds adoption. Many adoptive parents go through feelings of loss before turning towards adoption to build their family or while in the adoption process. And for birthmoms, adoption begins with the loss of the child. And even in an open adoption, where a birthmom still has some type of ongoing relationship with her child, there remains the loss of her every day motherhood.  While open adoption relationships can be healthy and positive,... Read more…

January 18, 2017

Choosing To Room With Your Baby Before Placement

If you are pregnant and making an adoption plan, you are likely thinking about your upcoming labor, delivery, and hospital stay. One of the things to give some thought and consideration to (that is a big deal for most placing Moms) is whether to have your new baby room in with you during the hospital stay. If your baby is born with no complications, is healthy and you also had no complications, are doing well and stable, you typically have the option to have your baby in your hospital... Read more…

December 9, 2016

Creating Holiday Traditions As A Birthmother

Holiday traditions amongst families are a big deal. As birthmoms, knowing your child isn’t a part of these traditions can be hard. But you can create your own holiday traditions with your child. They may not be the same traditions your family has, but they can be special traditions between you and your child. Personally, my holiday tradition for my son revolves around ornaments. I recall browsing through the mall just before his first Christmas when he was just a couple of months old. I spotted a beautiful Precious Moments baby’s first Christmas ornament... Read more…

December 5, 2016

Surviving The Holidays As A Birthmother

Christmas (and other major holidays) as a birthmother is tough. You can almost physically see the missing chair at the dinner table. You know where your child’s stocking should hang on the chimney. You are keenly aware that holidays are a time for families to come together, but you aren’t your child’s everyday mother, and you are missing out. This can be a tough reality making the holidays a dreaded time of the year for many birthmothers. The good news is you can survive the holidays and hopefully enjoy them a little bit too! Below are some ways to... Read more…

November 21, 2016

What I’m Thankful For As A Birthmother

Thanksgiving is right around the corner. Many people use this time of year to reflect on what they have and what they are thankful for. Over the past couple of years there has even been a social media movement where people list something they are thankful for every day. As a birthmother, adoption is often filled with grief and working through the hard stuff. But I like to try and find the good in all situations. So today I want to reflect on what I am thankful for in... Read more…