Holidays with my family tend to be a little more low key than Kristia’s. Another one just passed with this year’s Father’s Day. I stopped by, along with some of my siblings, and shared a Root Beer Float with my old man and some brownies (there always is dessert around his sweet tooth). We talked about the summer (which was hot), and work (which he is retired from) and golf (which he will never retire from). It was just like a normal visit to seem my parents, which I counted as a good Father’s Day. He also counted it as a good day but since he’s retired most days are good days.
On the flip side, in our group of friends we have quite a few fathers, and it seems like the day is a bit more eventful with younger kids than it is when your children are grown up. Pictures and posts from friends show a plethora of outings and cakes and handmade cards.
Seeing the two in contrast makes me excited to find out what kind of Father’s Day I would want to have. Would I stick with the low key celebration like I’m used to or would we go out and celebrate somewhere. Maybe we’d split the difference and do a little of each. Or, in the end, would I just sit in the hammock and make the kid mow the lawn for me. That one sounds particularly interesting…
Happy Mother’s Day!
We are blessed to have wonderful mothers and women in our lives. It is great to honor all of these women on Mother’s Day. My wonderful mother-in-law, Marilyn, who welcomed me into the family, is a former computer programmer, and expert chocolate chip cookie baker. My strong stepmother, Laura, who has been part of my family since i was 11, is a business owner in a male dominated industry, and is one of the best women to have by your side. My amazing mom, Jeanne, who started it all, is a musician, a business woman, a loving mom, and is always there for a hug, words of support, and a laugh. I am so thankful I can call each of these mothers mine.
Mother’s day in adoptive families is extra special. Our child will have many women to celebrate this day as well. They will have at least two mothers to remember & call on this day. Both mother’s will shape them in different ways as they grow up. This poem I believe captures this feeling.
“Once there were two women who never knew each other
One you [will] remember, the other you call Mother
Two different lives shaped to make you one
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun
The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it
The first gave you a need for love, the second was there to give it
One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name
One gave you a talent, the other gave you aim
One gave you emotions, the other calmed your fears
One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried you tears
One made an adoption plan, that was all that she could do
The other prayed for a child, and God led her straight to you.
Now, which of these two women, Are you the product of?
Both, my darling, Both, Just two different types of love.”
On this mother’s day I find myself looking forward. Mike & I have been in the process to adopt for about 4 years now. Each mother’s day during this process has been a bit harder than the last. I am so excited to have a child & to get to spend time with them on this day. I am looking forward to being woken up in the wee hours because they are excited to start the day. I am excited about going outside with them, going on a bike ride or playing with dirt in the garden. I am even looking forward to being able to comfort them when they cry, with hugs, soothing words, and assurance that they are safe with me. In short, I am looking forward to all the ups & all the downs that motherhood will bring. Each year that passes during our wait is a reminder that I am not yet able to experience motherhood. I am hoping that next year will be the year.