Adoption Blog - Adoptimist
September 26, 2016

Five Tips for Women Considering Adoption from an Adoption Attorney

What are some of the most critical issues for women considering adoption? Here are five tips for planning the right adoption for you, which I have learned during 30 years as an adoption attorney. 1. Understand Your Rights and Responsibilities • Choosing a family for your baby is probably the most important decision you will ever make. The starting point is... Read more…

May 20, 2016

When Your Child’s Birthmother Seems Distant

Recently, I was speaking to a group of prospective and adoptive parents about the importance of keeping their word to maintain contact with their child’s birthparents and was stopped mid-sentence by an adoptive mother. She said, “What if we want to communicate but our child’s birthmother disappears or doesn’t respond to our efforts?” What a great question. So much emphasis is put on the importance of adoptive parents not “backing out” of their agreement and how devastating it is for a birthmother if they do. Studies even suggest that... Read more…

March 1, 2016

Simple Ways To Remember And Honor Your Child’s Birth Mother

“What are your favorite colors?” my son’s new mother asked me one week before I gave birth to our son. Of all the questions that I expected to hear from her, that was not one of them! A week later when I placed my precious baby boy into her arms, she handed me a beautiful necklace with a “special” charm, a dark brown teddy bear with a pink, heart-shaped bellybutton and a photo album that she handmade…with my favorite colors. After twenty-three years and numerous broken gold chains, I haven’t lost the charm she gave me. The teddy bear sits on my... Read more…

February 19, 2016

Being Honest With Your Child’s Birth Mother

A few days before I met with my son’s new family, I was handed a list of questions that I could ask them about their parenting style, family traditions, religious preferences, etc. After all, it was important for me to know the truth about this family that I was entrusting with my most prized possession. Their parent profile answered most of my questions prior to the meeting. In fact, it was in part, because of their honest... Read more…

February 11, 2016

Expressing Love & Support For A Birth Mother From Birth Parents

How can an adoptive family express their love and support for the woman who gave life to their child? “After watching my child enter the world, I looked over at her (my child’s birthmother). At that very moment, I felt so much love for her. I was keenly aware that she was the reason I was becoming a mother. How would I ever express the depths of my love for her?” What a great question. How can an adoptive family express their love and support for the woman who... Read more…

December 20, 2012

After the Connection: Working with an Expectant Mother, Part Two

In my last article, I discussed some ways you can prepare yourself emotionally for the first meeting with an expectant mom considering adoption. This article will focus on practical issues you’ll want to think about and be prepared to discuss at the actual meeting. It is important to remember that although this is just an initial meeting, the expectations you have (as well as those of the of expectant parents) will help to determine the viability of a... Read more…

October 18, 2012

After the Connection: Working with an Expectant Mother, Part One

Now that your profile has been selected by an expectant mother considering adoption, I’m certain you’re feeling anxious, excited, and nervous all at once. Your thoughts and emotions are all going in a million different directions and you’ve probably put an immense amount of pressure on yourself before the actual first contact, whether on the phone or in person. While I’m not an adoptive parent and haven’t been in your... Read more…

September 24, 2012

Effective Adoption Profiles: A Birthmother’s Perspective

I think there are hopeful adoptive parents out there that might believe that we birth parents had specific things we desired or didn’t when we were expectant parents considering adoption. I know that I, along with other birth moms that I know, have been asked in the past or even recently what we looked for in the families that we ultimately selected as if there’s a magical combination that will make the hopeful adoptive parents more selectable. Unfortunately there isn’t a magical combination of attributes, or lack thereof, to which I can point you that... Read more…